Walk it Out

While flying may be seen as the ultimate goal

I’ve found the experience to take a far greater toll

For we as human beings cannot sustain such heights

When we come tumbling down

It takes all our might to once again move confidently on the ground

So I will keep on walking it out

Perhaps with occassional leap into the air or a tumble down

Yet in all of it

I want my feet to be planted in the here and now

Having learned from the past

And allowing the future to unfold with carefully tended goals

And the compassionate resilience that comes from living through life’s unexpected tumbles and rolls

Time to Grow

I need to grow

I know

I need to release preconceived notions of how I thought things were going to be

And really breathe into the present

The funny thing is the present is looking pretty good right now

If these damn expectations would just take a hike so I could see today in its full light

I am doing what I love to do

Its educational, creative, collaborative, and fulfilling

I work remotely from home

Not what I expected but there are unique opportunities that have grown

I have a partner

We have shared different journies

We are anchored with common values and a shared enjoyment of activities

He treats me with great love, loyalty and steadfast compassion

It deepens my love for him moment by moment and with each recollection

He too has a career he loves – writing and creating

We found each other

It must have come from the heart because now my mind with all its stuffy norms is trying to keep up

As if it would like to perform one elaborate survey to analyze whether every factor will all work out

When in reality I need to have a little more faith and a lot less doubt

To learn how to be supportive accepting and kind when his journey looks different than mine

For it is that beautiful combination of love, trust and encouragement where solid relationships are built

So I will press on

Be grateful for all the unexpected beauty I’ve stumbled upon

To stop trying to shape thigs based on archaic norms or childlike imaginings

For neither could hold a candle with the real thing

The joy it all brings

For his virtue speaks louder than anything

I Will Try – A Tribute to Mandy Harvey

“I don’t feel the way I used to

The sky is grey more then it is blue…

I don’t live the way I want to

The whole picture never came into view

I’m tired of getting used to the day

So I will try” (Mandy Harvey)

Inspiring words that are now reverberating in hearts and minds

After an inspiring performance that’s  echoing across the globe

It is one I’d like you to know

Mandy Harvey, 29

Born the same year as mine

Music was her love, her joy, her life

And she lost her hearing practically the moment she was an adult

Of course it was not her fault

A connective tissue disorder rendered her legally deaf

This was not the picture she had in mind

The was not the cards she thought she had – certainly not at that time

She was a young woman in her prime

Yet here it was

There was no denying or blaming

It simply was what it was

Instruments were put in closet

Music was a thing of the past

But she just couldnt stop singing

Couldn’t stop writing

She tried on another career, but it didn’t hold a candle to music

So she started painting another picture

Sure this landscape looked different

There were new people on the scene

But

Her heart was still her heart

Her spirit was still her spirit

It all cried for music

She found another way through it

Feeling vibrations through her feet

Using tuners to tune her vocals along with the rest of the musical fleet

She sang

Really sang

Skin tingling, heart pounding, tears swelling singing

It is an incredible testament to how there are times

When we all need to chart different paths to truly allow our gifts to shine

No matter the troubles that happen to us

We are resilient

Body, spirit and mind

So I will try!

 

 

Performance Link – Mandy Harvey

References

Lyrics from Mandy Harvey song she wrote called “Try”

One step forward

One step forward

Another to the side

A slip and slide back

And another forward tap

It may seem like you’re in the same place

Yet there’s movement in this space

For the slip and slides

Do not go one for such a long ride

The forward steps are taken with greater confidence

And the steps to the side

Well they confide a different perspective

That can be welcomed as a gentle corrective

Rejoicing in the Sun after Standing in the Rain

I was once heard this teaching from a Buddhist Monk

“It’s okay

You can take your umbrella down”

It made me stop a moment and look around

To ponder the times I may too be taking unneccary precautions long after the storm had passed

There’s something to be learned from these words spoken to me seemingly so fast

For it is true that when it has rained for so many days

You just start carrying it with you

The sun rays seem fleeting

Often shrouded by cloud after cloud

The familiar precaution just seems practical and sound

Yet those rays aren’t always fleeting

The clouds do not all pour with rain

So we must rearrange

Put on sunglasses and sunscreen

Leave the umbrella in the car

Let some bare skin be seen

Soak up the warmth and light

Filling us from every side

To simply be you

Revelling in the joys of being under the skies of a brilliant blue

As for those clouds that formed the storms of yesterday?

They now transform into new colours and shapes

Finding meaning from what once a swirl of chaos and confusion

Now it is given a whole new conclusion.

One of awareness, recognition  and understanding

To say “I know there may be days where I’ll need my umbrella,

But today’s not one of those days.

I won’t let that silly old thing stand in way from catching the brilliance of the beautiful sun rays.”

Facing fears & Respecting Fears

Facing trepidations is the surest way to living life more freely

When I say face, I more mean turn and glance a little more clearly

Then perhaps a moment or two longer and with great initial effort you can simply turn and face

Stand firmly in in your place

Perhaps thoroughly afraid

Yet now you have the current awareness not just a memory that was once made

The forms and shapes don’t seem quite so scary

The worries less likely with substance that’s rather airy

Although there can be times in facing fear where we are in great distress and in those moments seeking a safe haven till next time round is absolutely something to celebrate

For there too were lessons you have found and understanding you created

It truly is a human journey to learn to live with and manage our fears

Of course we’d like them to all disappear, yet when listened to with a skillful ear, fear can be useful when honest to goodness danger is near

The trouble is we often confuse danger with theings that are not dangerous at all

A lost cell phone, a public presentation, a performance

None of these things pose a threat to the integrity of life as we know it

Even if we were to blow it

The consequences would be far less than what we would have imagined it.

So name you fears and face them one by one

Really take the time to see – is there real danger there? If so, this is not the kind of fears to tackle but rather to respect why they’re there. If the fears are not truly dangerous then begin facing them in the open air…

Slowly

Gently

With great compassion

And while it may be distressing at first, overtime you too may find your life begin to spread out wide

To Fortifyingly Stand

Conflicts happen

Often rather unexpectantly

There is a disconnect between what we had hoped and what we received that leaves us feeling somewhat empty

Other times mad, sad or just plain angry

The swirl of emotion amidst unexpected conflict can cause quite the commotion

We often need a moment to settle to see what’s really troubling to us

For balance is a must

We need to consider the wider story and have the facts speak as loud as the emotion

This is our great commission to balance our feelings with grounded facts so we may be able to navigate upon any track

For in truth feelings are just another form of information

Personal information that can be cloudy when seen as just a pain

Yet can be great indicators when used skillfully and with appropriate reigns

I am still trying to figure out what to do when I don’t see eye to eye with those close to me

I know my feelings play an important role to indicate when something isn’t quite right

Then its up to the rational side to see if its them or if its just me

There are times I just have an off day and things just rub the wrong way

There are other times I need to speak up and say that wasn’t okay

Let’s take the time to talk it out and make it through this initial fray

It’s truly case by case

A balance of all you know in your mind and feel in your heart

Thankfully we are all figuring out the art of being human

Forgiveness goes hand and hand with any relationship that fortifyingly stands

Birthday Tribute

From the East Coast seas to Central Ontario land

This journey took many plans

Boxes piled upon boxes and lists upon lists

You both drove and flew through the sun, rain and mist

With a deep exhale, you can begin settling in

Discovering shortcuts to the grocer

And a splash pad in your corner

The girls too are discovering their new home

And making it their own

Even helping to clean up

With baking soda by the cup

It’s been a busy time and it’s hard to find a moment or two

To

Pause and

Truly

Celebrate

You

You as a mother, daughter, sister and friend

You as an aunt, wife and physician

Happy Birthday Sister dear!

We’re all glad you’re near

Here’s to this new year

And the many adventures you’ll have in your new home here