Sing Your Song

Certainty
Perfection
Absolute clarity

At times, we look for this desperately
In hopes it will bring what we are trying to find

Yet, certainty becomes a wall
Certainty leads to extremes that often have little evidence at all
Eventually it crumbles and falls
As this world moves, it’s not one to stand fixed and tall

Now please don’t get me wrong
I am not talking about deeply held virtues or faith
About the belief in mystery and connections beyond what we can see
I’m talking about the extremes

This is all right; That is all wrong
All good, all bad
With us, or against us
These dichotomies are built on so many lies and insecurities
It’s hard to describe

This kind of certainty alienates us from one another
When we are living life with absolute certainty
We can no longer compassionately hear those who are struggling
We can no longer hear those with a different point of view even if it’s strikingly true
They simply bring too much fear to what we are masking to stay clear

Don’t get me wrong, certainty is not without attraction
The idea we could know this love would never die
Or healing would be sure to happen if we did this one thing right
That we could always have clear sign posts through each stage of our lives

Who wouldn’t want that?

Yet in chasing certainty, we run away from each other and ourselves
We need to learn how to navigate the mess and tolerate some distress
Walk through the chaos and the storms
Know that there is light with every single morn

To trust we’ll know how to get there
Even when there’s no GPS or step by step manual for how we’ll do it
We’ll get there with perseverance, courage and care

Of course, we are to learn from those who’ve gone before
Seek guidance of trusted friends, family members and mentors

To lessen expectations
Yet steadfastly build hope
To release the need for perfection
Yet, find meaningful ways of contribution

There is no doubt uncertainty is a vulnerable space
We may have to face shame, fear and our struggle for worthiness
In other words, yes, we will have to face some of the mess

Yet, uncertainty is also the birth place of
Joy,  belonging, creativity and love (Brown B, 2011)
This just won’t be experienced, if you’re all armored up

Surrounded with expectations of what you think life should be
These expectations often trickle down not only to you, but also to me
And I think you might agree this is not how we deep down want to be

We want to be accepting
So let’s trade perfection for compassion
Certainty for vulnerability
Numbing for resiliency
Comparison for creativty (Brown B., 2012)

For you are you are you
Only you can decide to show up
And have the courage to not only to show up, but be  seen (Brown B., 2017)

To enter the arena of life in all of its challenges and awe-striking beauty
And sing your story; sing the song that is yours to sing
In doing so, our lives take on much greater meaning
Than any “perfect” drawing we might have once imagined in a dream

 

 

 

References

Brown, B. (2011). The Power of Vulnerability. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o&t=2s 

Brown, B. (2012). Daring Greatly. New York, USA: Penguin

Jarvis, C. (2017). Brené Brown: The Quest for True Belonging. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gm9JrYhF-Bk&t=2156s

 

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